Thursday, June 28, 2012

20 days old 6-28-12


Jordan is 20 days old today.  I always seem to miss him a lot on the days that we don’t visit.  I know that this schedule is the best for us though.  If we were to visit every day, we would be overwhelmed.  We would also never get any of the paperwork completed or any housework finished.  I think it would also be a lot harder on Jason because he would not get the quality attention that he needs from his mom and dad.  I would so love to see baby boy every day though.  I find myself staring at his pictures a lot.  I keep asking myself when we will start to feel normal again; but what really is normal?    Sometimes my human emotional side takes over.  I tend to stress about when things will get done and who will do them.  I think I spend more time planning what to do when than actually doing things.  This is definitely an area that I need to give over to God.
Our lovely and wonderful friend Michiko called the NICU to get our update on Jordan today.  They weighed him again and his new weight is 15.76 ounces.  He is so close to being a whole pound!  We are so blessed.  You can see the differences in weight gain on his body.  I love that he is getting chunkier.  He is now eating 6ml of milk 8times per day.  Today he was having a few issues that needed treatment.  First, his blood pressure was low.  Second, he was having difficulty urinating.  It really is a daily struggle for him and for us.  He has to fight to live every single day.  Since he is so young, he has many risks and many things his body has to overcome.  Some of these issues can continue even after he is released from the hospital.  We do know that God has an awesome plan for his life and will use him in great ways.  We just have to trust that God will continue to give him and us the strength to carry through.  When we place all of our trust in the lord, He will direct our paths.  Mathew 19:26 says, “With man this is impossible, but with God, all things are possible.”  I have held on to this verse many times and have used it to comfort me and give me strength.  My desires for Jordan are that he would be able to overcome all of these challenges and be released from the NICU with no lasting effects from being premature.  I desire that he would have a long and healthy life will all of the benefits that his brother has and all of the energy that comes with being a little boy.  These are my own personal desires.  I can only pray that God’s plans match my desires for his life and trust that God knows what is best.
We spent the morning sleeping in, skyping with family, and playing games with Jason.  He is getting so good at kicking the ball.  Jacob was working with him on his soccer skills and Jason was having so much fun.  He loves it when we give him attention and when we focus on him.  He needs this attention and emotional attachment.  This afternoon, Jason let me sing him to sleep and he fell asleep in my arms.  It was nice to have some cuddle time with my big boy! Mommy needed that time more than Jason will ever know.  It is so important to make your children feel special and loved each and every day.  We tell Jason how much we love him multiple times per day.  We want him to grow up knowing that he is such a special person in our lives. 
This afternoon, we went to work on some of the paperwork to register Jordan’s birth and to get his passport ready.  There is a lot of additional work that has to be done since he was born in a Japanese hospital.  Today we did not manage to get anything accomplished because we were just directed to different locations each time.  The main office that we need to visit has strict hours of 9-11 and 1-2 every day.  Don’t you wish that was your working schedule?! Sometimes the military “red tape” can be frustrating.  I guess that is just part of life though.  I would imagine that every business or lifestyle would have its quirks and annoying parts.
I am so thankful for Jacob.  I am so scared about him returning to work.  He still does not have a date to return yet but I know that it is coming.  It almost seems too good to be true that he would have three weeks off with no consequences.  I know that God is guiding things though.  Jacob has been such a huge supporter and helper.  I am thankful that he is my life partner in love!
I especially want to say a prayer about Colorado today.  Both Jacob’s and my families live there.  Currently, there are 11 fires around the state causing so much damage and burning many homes and so much land.  We call this place home and it is devastating to think of it being burned.  Two of the fires are pretty close to my family.  My sister was saying that her yard is covered in ash because of the fire being so close.  They are still far enough away from the actual burning but that is still scary to think about.  Please keep the people of Colorado in your prayers and pray for rain and safety.
Lord, I want to thank you for your blessings.  We are so grateful to have two amazing little boys.  We ask that you would be with Jordan each and every moment of every day.  Give him your strength and continue to work miracles in his little body.  We praise you for his weight gain and we ask that you would heal his body of the issues going on today.  We also ask that you would continue to touch his lungs.  Help them to mature and grow so that he may be able to come off of the ventilator on time.  We know that your plans for his body and life are perfect.  You have big plans for him and for us.  I pray that your plans would match my desires for him to have a long and healthy life.  I also pray that you would allow us to be great testimonies to the miracles that you are doing and that many lives would be changed through our story.  We glorify your name for this time that we have been given.  Lord I want to pray for Jason.  Help him to continue to be an active and wonderful little boy.  Be with his attitude and help him to overcome those two year old tendencies.  Give us patience and love as we parent.  Thank you for the little moments and the time and fun that we get to have with him.  Please be with us and give us strength to accomplish our tasks.  Help us to overcome any laziness that we may be feeling.  Lord, I really and truly pray that you would send your rain down to Colorado and wipe out those fires.  We know that your power is awesome.  Please surround your creation with you love and grace.  We pray for safety for those fighting the fires and pray that the people of Colorado would turn their eyes toward you during this struggle.  We thank you for your grace and love.  We ask all these things in your name, Amen.

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